Current location:	bedroom
Current mood:	accomplished
Current music:	Bruised - The Bens

Chapter Twenty-Two
Oh my god!

Holy crap! It's been waaaaaaaaaaaaay too long since I last updated. I can't believe it. Just wow. I really must apologize about that. I finally finished the next chapter. It took me a bit of time, but I finally did. I had planned to include more, but then split the chapter so that I could finish it faster and so that it wouldn't be so long. But then my mind had other plans, and I ended up adding some other scenes (which I love! So I'm glad my mind thought of them lol), and it ended up being a long chapter and taking me longer to finish anyway.

Whatever. Okay, there's quite a bit Zac/Jolyn interaction in this chapter because well, it'll be in short supply in the next few chapters probably, but you'll find out why in this chapter. And you'll find out another reason why in the next chapter. The bonus of me splitting the chapter means the next chapter has been started. There's still quite a bit to add, but at least I won't be starting from scratch, and hopefully, I can finish it soon.

This chapter isn't the most exciting, and I apologize. I think it's partly because it's been so long since I've written Jolyn and Zac that I need to get back into the groove. It's certainly not my best writing, and I feel as though it's all over the place. So just hang in there with me. :) I hope you enjoy it regardless.

In other news, my story has been nominated over at The Ugly Truth Awards hosted by the wonderful Heather and Kristy. I have a feeling Kristy (zorianna) is to thank for that. So Kristy, thank you! If it wasn't Kristy, whoever you are, thank you! The story has been nominated in six categories.

Best Opening Scene
Best Laugh Out Loud Moment - Chapter Seven (which I'm assuming it's referring to the part where we first meet drunken Taylor hah)
Best Zac
Best Friend - Sophia
Character You Most Relate To - Jolyn
Not Updated Enough But Should Be (I think this one is trying to tell me something. lol For some reason, I knew that if I was nominated, it would be in this category. I wonder why....)

Voting is scheduled to start Jan. 14th, but I know there has been talks of pushing it back some if they don't get more nominations. Anywho, if you want to go vote when the time comes, that's cool. If not, more power to ya! :)

Lastly, some of you already know about this, but I've joined the 100hanson community. It's a drabble community. If you don't know what a drabble is, it's a piece of writing that is exactly 100 words. So the challenge is to write a 100 drabbles based on a 100 different themes. I've only done two so far. I'm not sure if I'm going to take the challenge of trying to do all 100. We know how I am when it comes to commitments and finishing things. Anyway, I've included the two drabbles I've done in this post.

Title: Tainted
Rating: PG
Word Count: 100
Challenge: (if applicable) 044: Perfect
Character/Pairing: Zac
Warnings: (if applicable) None
Author Notes: (if applicable) Eh?

Everything about his lips is pure perfection. The shape, the silky texture, the delicious taste. The frenzy they create in my heart with just a murmur of love. His lips beckon me through the day, echoing my name, urging me to scratch my itch.

Curled on the couch, my perfection stands before me. I smile brightly, anticipating and waiting for those perfect lips to curl into a smile mirroring my own.

“I don’t love you anymore,” he states stoically, poison spewing from perfection, tainting it and leaving behind a foul taste.

Everything about his lips used to be pure perfection.



Title: Deception
Rating: R
Word Count: 100
Challenge: (if applicable) Bruised
Character/Pairing: Zac
Warnings: (if applicable) Swearing, Sexual situation (implied)
Author Notes: (if applicable) My first drabble ever. Woo!

“Why’d you fucking do it?!” she screamed, picking up the cordless phone next to her and hurling it at the wall.

They both watched as it shattered to pieces on the hard wooden floor. The wooden floor they had both immediately fallen in love with when they had first toured the apartment. The hard wooden floor that had burned and colored her skin with delicate bruises and scratches as he thrust inside her, murmuring that he would always love her.

The bruises on her skin had faded with time; this bruise he was leaving on her heart would stay forever.



*This chapter is split into two posts because LJ told me the entry was too long. Uh, is that a good thing? Even with all of my babbling deleted, it was still too long. Goodness. So I included a link at the end to take you to the second part. :)

Chapter Twenty-Two

“Where are you?”

Jolyn laughed into the phone, continuing her trek down the street, being careful not to slip on any ice that may have been hidden underneath the blanket of snow. “I’m almost there. Quit freaking out because I’m walking in the dark by myself.”

Even though it was a Sunday and she had class the following morning, tonight was Isaac’s birthday party that Zac invited her to the night before while on their date, and she had readily agreed to attend. The trek from her dorm to Zac’s apartment took only a matter of twenty minutes, but yet, Zac continued to call her every few minutes, wondering where she was and making sure she was okay.

“I’m not freaking out. I’m just wondering where you are. I’m bored,” whined the voice on the other end.

“How can you be bored? There are tons of people there.”

“None of whom are you, and you are the only one I want to be with right now.”

Trying to fight the smile creeping across her face, she couldn’t deny the fluttering in her stomach, and Zac knew it.

“Don’t deny the smile,” he whispered. “You know you like it.”

“Shut up,” and with that she hung up, stuffing her phone back into her purse, smiling widely.

Moments later, she reached Zac and Isaac’s apartment building and waited for someone to buzz her in.

“I knew you couldn’t resist me,” smirked Zac into the intercom.

“How the hell did you know it was me?”

“Because I’m psychic.”

“That’s great. Now let me up.”

“Hmm, what’s in it for me?”

“Nothing. Now, come on. It’s cold out here.”

“Mmm, no.”

“Zac, do you really want me to freeze my butt off where anyone could just come along and kidnap me at gunpoint?” she asked innocently, knowing exactly how he felt about her being out in the city at night all alone.

She laughed, shaking her head, when he immediately buzzed open the door to let her in.

“That was cruel,” he stated a minute later when she stepped into their warm apartment, shutting the door behind her.

She merely shrugged, handing off her present for Isaac to Zac to hold as she took off her coat.

“It really wasn’t fair, you know,” he continued to pout.

“Hey, I was just speaking the truth. It could have really happened.”

“I know that,” he whined. “Don’t remind me. It’s bad enough that you insisted on coming over here by yourself.”

“Aw, but I’m here now, aren’t I?” she grinned, leaning close to him and pressing a kiss to his lips.

“Well, yeah,” he mumbled against her lips, his bad mood softening. “But still,” he whimpered, leaning in for another kiss.

Jolyn laughed against his mouth, obliging his request, and wrapped her arms around his neck, pressing her body against his slightly. “So where’s the birthday boy?” she questioned, pulling away from the kiss just as Zac tried to deepen it.

Zac groaned, stuffing his face into her neck, his warmth breath tickling her skin. “Talk about killing the mood.”

“What mood? You pouting and whining doesn’t really put me in the mood.”

“I beg to differ. You’re the one who was just all over me.”

“Right,” she laughed, taking Isaac’s present from his hands and stepping away from him in search of the birthday boy.

Jolyn easily spotted him in the corner talking to a pretty brunette who she didn’t recognize, decided to leave him be while he worked his magic, and instead quickly wandered off to place his present on his bed in his room. Just as she turned around to exit his room, Zac entered, pushing her back in with a gentle hand on her stomach and shutting the door to Isaac’s room slightly.

“Now, I’ve got you all alone,” he whispered, wrapping his arms around her slim waist.

“Zac,” she laughed, pushing him away lightly. “Not now.”

“Aw, come on. I’ve missed you like crazy.”

“I just saw you yesterday. Heck, not even twenty-four hours ago,” she argued.

“And your point is? I still missed you, and besides, Ike doesn’t even know you’re here yet; so it’s not like he’ll miss you for a little bit.”

“Yes, I do,” interrupted Isaac as he stepped into his room. “I saw her come in, and my God, she’s got you whipped already.”

“Whatever,” mumbled Zac as Jolyn pulled away from him and walked over to hug Isaac tightly and wish him a happy birthday.

Isaac returned the hug gratefully, and the two walked off, chatting happily and a mile a minute, as Zac followed behind them, pouting and muttering a few choice curse words to himself. After twenty minutes, Zac was finally able to pull her away from Isaac, and the next hour was spent chatting and mingling with some people that Jolyn had met briefly a few times before. In the midst of it all, she had been hugged tightly and greeted brightly by an already tipsy Taylor, and she laughed, hugging him back. She glanced around the crowded room, trying to spot Natalie as she had yet to approach her, and noticed that she had hung back.

Doing her best to shrug it off and convince herself it was nothing, she turned back to the present conversation she was having and did her best to give Zac a genuine smile when he squeezed her arm lightly and gave her a questioning and worried look. She returned her attention back to the conversation taking place, forgetting about Natalie for the time being, and another hour later, the massive group of people gathered in Zac and Isaac’s apartment decided to head to Bar 13 for Isaac’s birthday bash.

The bar was already pounding with the bass of the music when they arrived, and many of the guests were well on their way to being trashed, including Taylor. As soon as they had walked through the door of the club, Zac grabbed Jolyn’s hand, making a beeline for the bar.

“Zac,” she laughed, tugging on his hand. “Slow down.”

Zac stopped, turning around to grin at her. “No way. I’m going to get you horribly drunk so I can take advantage of you later on.”

She stepped closer to him, leaning in to whisper in his ear slyly, “You don’t have to get me drunk to take advantage of me.”

Zac groaned, wrapping his arms around her waist to pull her closer to him. “You drive me crazy,” he whispered, his mouth to her ear.

“I know,” she smirked, wrapping her arms around his neck.

She watched his head dip low and felt his full lips caress her neck, her eyes closing. Her body shivered from the contact, and he grinned against her skin, loving the effect he had on her. His lips trailed down her neck and to her collarbone, whispering across her silky skin, and he planted a small kiss at the base of her neck before trailing his way back up to her lips.

He brushed his full lips across her smooth ones, increasing the pressure when she responded slightly, and she felt his hands move from around her waist to grip her hips when she nibbled lightly on his bottom lip. Zac groaned low in his throat, captivated by her actions, and pulled her closer to his body by her hips as he slipped his tongue into her mouth.

“Get a room,” teased Isaac as he passed by, bumping them with his shoulder playfully.

Pulling away as Zac protested, Jolyn laughed and wiped her mouth with the back of her hand discreetly. “You’re just jealous,” she called after him playfully.

“Of you, no. Of Zac? Yes,” he winked.

“Aw, do you want a kiss for your birthday?” she questioned, bouncing over to him.

“I don’t think Zac would appreciate that,” he grinned, glancing at his brother over Jolyn’s shoulder.

Jolyn shrugged her right shoulder, turning her head to glance at Zac. “He’ll get over it,” she teased, standing on her toes to kiss Isaac on the cheek. “Happy birthday,” she whispered, giving him a warm hug.

“All right. All right. Give her back,” demanded Zac, walking over to them.

“No, I’m keeping her,” teased Isaac, tightening his grip around Jolyn and swaying her in his arms lightly.

“Don’t make me beat you up on your birthday,” warned Zac.

“Okay. Okay,” retreated Isaac, stepping away from Jolyn with his hands in the air out in front of him. “You can have her back.”

Jolyn laughed, watching as Isaac made for the bar, before turning to face Zac. “No need to be jealous,” she smiled, wrapping her arms around Zac. “You’re the one that gets to take me home,” she whispered.

“You need to stop,” he warned playfully. “Or I’m going to ravage you right here. I don’t even care who sees.”

Shaking her head at his antics as she pulled away, she grabbed Zac’s hand, leading him to the dance floor. “Come on. We’ll dance out our sexual tension.”

“I can think of other ways,” he offered, grinning.

“Too bad. We’re dancing.”

Zac and Jolyn took their place on the dance floor in the midst of the crowd, hoping to dance their sexual tension away when, in fact, they only made it worse. Jolyn swayed her hips back and forth as Zac pressed his body against her back side, swaying with her and his hand splayed across her stomach as he pulled her back against his body. She placed her hand on top of his, moving to the music and shivering as Zac buried his face in her hair, his warm breath tickling her skin.

“I don’t think this is helping,” he murmured into her ear.

She laughed sexily, moving away from him as the song neared its end. “Sorry.”

“No, don’t go,” he whined, grabbing at her.

“Too bad,” she sang, changing the sway of her hips when a new song started.

Smirking, Zac just shook his head at her and returned to his dancing, content with watching her move her body to the music. They were in the middle of dancing and serenading one another with Bon Jovi’s Livin’ On A Prayer when they heard Taylor yell for Jolyn. She turned to see a drunken Taylor approaching them with three shot glasses, and she couldn’t help but giggle as he pushed his way through the crowd of people, knocking into them and spilling drops from the shot glasses as he yelled apologies over the music while laughing.

“I see your brother has taken full advantage of the open bar,” she giggled to Zac.

“You guys,” he slurred once he reached them, throwing an arm around Zac and spilling even more of the shot in his hand. “I brought shots!” he declared, raising his arms.

“Are they all for you?” asked Jolyn.

“Nope,” he grinned. “One for you guys, and two for me.”

“How about one for you and two for us,” suggested Zac.

“Don’t be so greedy, but whatever,” shrugged Taylor, handing off a shot to each of them.

Zac and Jolyn clinked their shot glasses and went to clink Taylor’s but stopped when they realized his was empty due to all the spilling he had done.

“Huh,” Taylor mused, inspecting the shot glass closely. “Where’d it go?”

“You must have done it already,” teased Zac.

Taylor turned his head, throwing it back slightly, to look at his brother. “You must be right. I better go get another one.”

“You do that, Tay,” chuckled Zac, patting his brother’s back lightly.

“I might just love your brother best when he’s drunk.”

“You might be the only one,” laughed Zac.

---------------------

Standing off to the side, surrounded by a few of Taylor’s friends, Natalie had already spent much of her night watching Zac and Jolyn on the dance floor. Her heart caught in her throat and her blood boiled in her veins with every touch of Zac’s hand to Jolyn’s hip, every small kiss they shared, and every sly smile. It was difficult to watch Zac with another girl when she knew he was still slightly committed to her best friend, especially when she recognized the look that Zac gave Jolyn. The look that meant he was falling. Hard and fast. The sight was surreal as she was used to Kate being the only girl in his life. She wasn’t used to seeing him look at another girl the way he used to look at Kate. She thought that look was only for Kate and would always only be for Kate. Never did she think Zac would be a two-timer, but she supposed he thought the same thing about himself.

She couldn’t deny that part of her resented Jolyn for befriending Zac in the beginning because then none of this would have happened, or perhaps it would have just been a different girl. The more she thought about it, she realized it wasn’t Jolyn’s fault. Jolyn couldn’t help that she didn’t know about Zac dating Kate if he never told her. And from what Taylor told her, Jolyn hadn’t gone into their relationship intending to date Zac, and in the end, Zac had to push Jolyn to give him a chance. The news of Zac fighting to date Jolyn hadn’t pleased her because it meant he was serious about their relationship, conveniently forgetting about Kate.

As time wore on, Natalie began to wonder if perhaps she was no better than Zac. She had known about the situation from the beginning; yet, she hadn’t told Jolyn or Kate about any of it. No one had, but then again, she also realized that it was no one’s place to do so but Zac’s. He had created the mess himself, and he was the only one that could fix it. All she could do was helplessly watch the two trains collide, standing in the smoke of the aftermath.

Natalie was pulled from her thoughts when Jolyn came into her line of focus, and she watched nervously as Jolyn made her way towards her through the crowd. She had purposely avoided Jolyn throughout the night, but she knew that sooner or later Jolyn would seek her out. As much as she wanted to, she couldn’t hate Jolyn. Jolyn was an incredibly sweet and likeable girl, and she was just as much of a victim and just as naïve as Kate was in the entire situation. Natalie almost felt sorry for her, knowing in the end someone would get hurt and that it could quite possibly be Jolyn. She knew much of what Jolyn had been through and hated to see such a sweet and still broken girl get broken down all over again. As Jolyn approached her, Natalie attempted to offer what she hoped was a warm and genuine smile.

“Your husband is one hell of a drunk,” giggled Jolyn after she approached Natalie and they watched Taylor serenade Isaac with yet another drunken rendition of Happy Birthday at the bar.

“Yeah, I don’t think that’s something I should brag about,” laughed Natalie.

“Yeah, probably not. He’s pretty entertaining though.”

“Well, I can’t deny that.”

A short lull of conversation fell between the two women, and Natalie began to wrack her brain in search of something to say. But the only thing she could think about was Zac and his betrayal of two women. She feared to open her mouth in the event that it would all come spewing out like vile poison, and that was part of the reason she had stayed away from Jolyn for most of the night.

She hated knowing something not everyone else knew. The guilt of keeping secrets, especially from her best friend and from girls who didn’t deserve it, placed way too much pressure on her. The situation was so taxing on her that she almost felt as though she was the one dating Zac and he was cheating on her. She never asked to be put in position she was in, and she hated, especially given the fact that Kate was her best friend, that Zac had put her in it and expected her to go along with it without question. If the circumstances had been different, she wouldn’t have harbored such resentment towards Zac, Jolyn, and Jolyn’s presence in Zac’s life. She truly liked Jolyn, but she couldn’t help but feel as though she was betraying her best friend by befriending the other woman. And that was a lot of guilt for her to carry.

“Are you excited to go home for the holiday?” questioned Jolyn, interrupting Natalie’s thoughts and trying to keep the conversation light and flowing.

Natalie nodded. “Yeah, I suppose Tulsa is home now.”

Jolyn gave her an odd look, and Natalie laughed lightly to herself. “I’m originally from Georgia. That’s where all of my family is.”

“Ahh. Do you miss it?”

“Very much, but I try to visit as often as I can, and Taylor makes sure of it. He knows how much my family means to. But really, I wouldn’t trade it for anything. The Hansons are my family now as well, and I love being so close to them. I could never be so far from Taylor,” smiled Natalie gently, watching her husband from across the room.

Jolyn followed Natalie’s gaze and smiled softly to herself, watching as Natalie gazed lovingly at her husband.
“How did Taylor and you meet then if you’re from Georgia?”

“Backstage after a show,” Natalie took a deep breath, containing herself from divulging too much information even though she wanted to. “My friend, my best friend in fact, apparently caught Isaac’s eye, and he invited us backstage. I met Taylor, and we hit it off.”

“Really? Wow. It’s like true rock ‘n roll style,” laughed Jolyn. “So did your friend and Isaac date?”

“Yeah, for a few weeks. Nothing too serious.”

“Where’s she now?”

“Back in Georgia. I saw her when we stopped there on the tour.”

“I bet that was nice,” smiled Jolyn politely.

“Yeah,” she smiled sadly.

“You miss her, huh?” asked Jolyn, catching the slight frown on Natalie’s face and misinterpreting its meaning.

“Yeah,” she nodded in response. “I do.”

“You should invite her out to New York sometime.”

“Yeah, maybe,” nodded Natalie, offering a tight smile. The conversation was making her very uncomfortable. Thankfully, her drunken husband appeared at the right time for once in his life just as Jolyn was about to continue on with the conversation.

“Hey babe,” he smiled widely.

“Hi drunky.”

“Maybe a little,” he slurred, slipping his arms around her thin waist as he leaned down to whisper into her ear.

Natalie giggled lightly as she shook her head and smiled up at Taylor after he had pulled away, the love glistening in both of their eyes. Though Jolyn had sworn off love and was scared of opening herself up to such vulnerability ever again, there were times where she couldn’t help but admit that she wanted nothing more than to be in love again and wanted that vulnerability that came with fully giving herself to someone. She wanted someone to remind her of how wonderful love could be, and she wanted someone to love her the right way, the way she was supposed to be loved. It was obvious Natalie and Taylor had that, and while she was happy for them, she was envious of their relationship and how in love they were. She wanted someone to look at her the way they were looking at each other.

Smiling softly at the couple lost in their own world but yet still feeling somewhat uncomfortable, Jolyn stepped away from them in search of Zac. Not surprisingly, she found him waiting at the bar for another drink, and she made her way over to him, standing behind him as she pressed her body against his.

“Can I get you a drink?” she asked, her voice low.

“Mmm, do that again,” murmured Zac, his eyes dancing playfully as he turned to face her. “Where’d you run off to?”

“I was talking with Natalie.”

“Really?” questioned Zac, a hint of surprise evident in his voice.

He didn’t mean for it to come out that way, but he was genuinely surprised that Natalie had actually held a conversation with Jolyn after the argument he and Natalie had had the day before over the whole situation.

“Yeah,” she answered, eyeing him with some suspicion. “Why?”

“Oh nothing,” he lied. “It’s just that Nat’s been in a bad mood, snapping at us guys. She hasn’t really talked to anyone.”

“Maybe she’s just sick of you boys. I know I would be,” she teased. “She seems better now though, especially with Taylor.”

“Oh God, did you have to witness one of their disgusting make-out sessions?”

Jolyn laughed, shaking her head. “No, but almost.”

“Consider yourself lucky,” he said, grabbing his drink after the bartender set it down.

“I’m sure they don’t enjoy watching us make-out,” contended Jolyn.

“Yeah, but we’ve only ever done that once in front of them, and that was tonight. Besides, we’re hot when we make-out.”

“Yeah, okay, maybe to each other, but not to anyone else, especially your brothers.”

“That’s their problem. They need to deal with it,” he shrugged. “If I’m forced to watch my brothers mack on women, they should be forced to suffer through the same thing.”

“Boys,” sighed Jolyn.

Zac merely smiled in her direction, changing the subject of their conversation. “How come Sophia and Jayden didn’t come tonight?”

Jolyn grinned. “Jayden took her on a date.”

“They’re dating?”

“Holy crap, I didn’t tell you.”

“Tell me what?”

“They’re dating.”

“Well, I gathered that much,” he smirked.

Jolyn playfully glared at him and then proceeded to fill Zac in on what had happened while they had been gone to Minnesota for her brother’s wedding and about how they had become a couple.

“Aw, how cute,” he cooed.

Jolyn slapped his arm. “It is!”

“Ow, okay,” he laughed, rubbing his arm. “You do know that that really does hurt when you hit me.”

“Why do you think I do it?” she questioned, sticking her tongue out at him.

“I would put that back unless you plan on using it.”

“Nope,” she grinned, stealing his drink and bouncing off towards the dance floor.

Zac growled after her, quickly ordering another drink and following her out to the dance floor. They spent the rest of the night dancing, singing along to all of the 80’s music, and being interrupted by Taylor to take shots. A few hours later, the last of the guests had trickled out, and Jolyn, Zac, his brothers, Natalie, and a few other friends decided to call it a night. It had been easier than expected to get Taylor to leave, and after thanking everybody working at the club, the group left, heading out into the cold winter night.

“Definitely a successful birthday party,” yawned Jolyn as she snuggled into Zac’s side for warmth and balance as they walked down the street toward Zac’s apartment.

Zac nodded. “You’re staying at my place, right?”

Jolyn shrugged her shoulder. “My own bed does sound kind of nice, but I’m too tired to make the trip back to my dorm.”

“Next sleep over, we’ll stay at your place,” he offered, knowing exactly how it felt to miss his own bed, especially when he was on the road and on the exhausting nights when all he wanted to do was crawl under his own sheets and into his own bed.

“Deal,” she smiled.

“How you feeling?”

“A little bit drunk,” she laughed.

“I noticed,” he chuckled, tightening his grip around her waist.

The couple lagged a few feet behind the group, getting a good view of the action in front of them. Jolyn giggled as she watched Taylor stumbled along, doing his best to sing Come On, Eileen. The lyrics were difficult enough to attempt sober, and trying to sing them while drunk was an even more difficult task. A point that Taylor was only proving as he was having little success singing the correct lyrics.

Stopping right in the middle of the sidewalk, he turned to face Zac and Jolyn, smiling. As they approached him, he simply grabbed Jolyn’s hand, pulling her from Zac’s grasp, and attempted to twirl her in circles while he continued to sing. Jolyn laughed, screeching Taylor’s name, and partook in Taylor’s antics but stopped not too soon after they started.

“Ooo,” she laughed, holding her stomach and wiping her eyes. “I don’t think that was such a good idea.”

“You’re not going to throw up, are you?” questioned Zac wearily as he approached Jolyn.

“No, I think I’m okay.”

“Good,” he said, wrapping his arm back around her waist.

“Jol,” Taylor said, walking over to her. “You’re hot,” he blurted.

“Thanks. You’re not so bad looking yourself, stud.”

Taylor grinned, swaying slightly. “Yeah, I know,” and with that, he turned back around and continued on his stumbling journey back to the apartment.

“Wow, not only is he a horrible singer while he’s drunk, but he’s cocky, too. Now, I know where you get it from,” she said, poking Zac in the side.

“Shut up, drunky.”

“Hey, you’re just as drunk as I am.”

“I know. Why do you think I’m holding onto you? And it’s not just because you’re pretty, and I’m trying to cop a feel.”

“Oh, someone’s going to get laid tonight,” sang Taylor.

“Taylor,” scolded Natalie. “Leave them alone.”

“I’m still going to get sex tonight, right?”

“You guys are not having sex at our place,” stated Isaac.

“Hey, don’t rain on my parade just because you ain’t getting any. So think again, Ikey,” slurred Taylor. “We will be having sex in your apartment!”

“Please, you’ll be passed out the minute your head hits the pillow.”

Behind Taylor, Natalie stifled a giggle, validating the truth behind Isaac’s statement. The group soon made it back to the apartment building, and they all nosily clambered up the stairs to the second floor. Zac and Jolyn were last to enter the apartment, trailing behind everyone else, and once the door was shut and locked, they bid everyone a goodnight and Isaac one last “happy birthday” before heading for Zac’s bedroom. With his hand grasping Jolyn’s, he led the way to his room and allowed Jolyn to slip past him before he shut the door to his room behind them.

Walking into his bedroom, Jolyn sobered immediately, nervous butterflies resting in the pit of her stomach. While they had had many sleepovers before, this was their first sleepover as a couple, and she wondered what Zac expected. If he expected sex, he would surely be disappointed.

Zac switched on one of the small table lamps near him and turned around to find Jolyn still standing, her back facing him. He smiled, slipping his arms around her waist, and buried his face in her hair. Jolyn placed her hands atop his that were clasped at her bellybutton and felt his lips caress her neck. Pulling away after a few seconds, he loosened his grasp and turned her in his arms so that she was facing him. He smiled softly when his eyes met hers, and he reached up to brush her bangs from her eyes. Cupping her cheek, he leaned down and placed a soft, gentle kiss on her lips. Jolyn tentatively responded, fearing where the kiss would lead to, and Zac noticed her hesitance when he tried to take the kiss to the next level.

“You okay?” he asked as he pulled away.

Jolyn nodded, offering a small smile. “I’m fine.”

He returned her smile. “I suppose you need some pajamas,” he whispered.

She nodded. “Yeah.”

“Of course, I wouldn’t mind if you slept naked,” he teased.

“Is that what you expected tonight?” she asked, becoming serious and stepping away from him.

“What?” he asked somewhat confused.

“Sex. Did you expect us to sleep together tonight?”

“No,” he shook his head, still confused as to where this was coming from and where it was going. “Is this because of what Taylor said?”

Jolyn shook her head. “No. I just want to know what your expectations were.”

“Jol,” he said, stepping towards her and grasping her arm lightly. “I didn’t expect anything. I never have, and I never will. I know we’ve known each other for awhile, but we’ve only been dating for a few weeks. We just took our relationship to a new level, and in no way, am I ready for us to sleep together.”

“Really?” she questioned sincerely, looking up at him.

“Really. I know I risk sounding like a girl. No offense,” he smiled slightly. “And while I am guy and have thought about us sleeping together and certainly wouldn’t mind it happening, I see sex as a big deal, and I don’t take it lightly. And given your past, I’m sure you don’t either.”

Jolyn nodded, confirming his suspicions.

“I know it’s going to be awhile if and when we sleep together, and I would like us to be a little bit further in our relationship before we further our physical relationship that far. We’re only casually dating. I want us to be in a serious relationship first. I know how hesitant you are to even be in a serious relationship that I wouldn’t even risk the idea of pushing you to sleep with me because I know how big of a deal it is for you as well. I respect you, Jol, and I respect what you want. If and when we move to that level in our relationship, I want us both to be ready and comfortable with it, and I’m sure I will be if and when you are,” he smiled.

Jolyn laughed at his last statement and stepped closer to him, closing the gap between them. She placed her hand on his arm and smiled up at him. “Thank you.”

“No need to thank me,” he said, pulling her into a hug.

“And you did sound like a girl,” she teased.

“Gee, thanks,” he stated sarcastically, giving her body a squeeze.

They stood in the middle of his room, hugging for a few minutes, Zac’s hands traveling up and down her back, and enjoying the silence before Jolyn spoke.

“So you’ve really thought about us together?”

Zac could feel the blood rushing to his face and the beginnings of a blush creeping into his cheeks, hoping to keep Jolyn in his arms so she couldn’t pull away and see his face. “Yeah.”

Jolyn felt her heart beat a little bit faster. The thought excited and scared all at the same time, but she had to admit that she had thought about it too. That in itself spoke volumes about the place Zac was taking in her life and in her heart because it had been quite sometime since she had thought about sleeping with a guy. “Was it good?”

“What do you think? Come on,” he said, pulling away from her. “Let’s get you some pajamas.”

Stepping over to his closet, Zac dug through his t-shirts and found the smallest shirt he could find before tossing it at her.

She unfolded it and held it out in front of her. “Sadam Hussein?”

Zac shrugged. “I’ve had it since I was like eleven or twelve.”

“And it still fits you?” she questioned skeptically.

“Oh yeah.”

“This I’ve got to see,” she stated before tossing the shirt back at him as he emerged from the closet with a pair of boxers for her to wear.

Zac caught it, laughing, and threw the pair of boxers at her. He unbuttoned his black shirt and slipped it off before tugging his wife beater over his head. Jolyn’s breath caught in her throat as she watched Zac. This was the first time since she had known Zac that she had seen him without his shirt on, and it was certainly a sight she could get used to. His skin was still bronzed from the summer sun, and his chest was sparse with hair. Her eyes caught sight of the lovely trail of hair that led to places she had only thought about. She liked the thought that it was all hers and couldn’t wait to find out what else he to offer in time. It was then she realized that she was staring and shamelessly checking him out. She looked up at Zac and saw that he was watching her, a small smirk on his face.

“Just put the shirt on,” she stated, rolling her eyes, knowing what he was thinking.

“Are you sure you don’t want to look some more? I may even let you touch,” he teased, taking full advantage of the fact that she liked what she saw.

“Put the shirt on.”

“Touchy,” he chuckled, pulling the shirt on over his head. “See,” he stated proudly.

“Hmm, it’s a little tight,” she smirked, stepping closer to him. “Chubby,” she added, giggling, poking him in the stomach.

Zac’s face took on a mock look of offense. “Excuse me, but I am not the Pillsbury Doughboy. That’s it. No sex for you.”

“Darn. Good thing I don’t want it.”

“Whatever. You want my hot body,” he contended, pulling the shirt off and tossing it at Jolyn, letting it hit her in the face.

He turned back to his closet in search of a shirt for himself when he suddenly felt Jolyn’s hand caress his back, exploring the new skin before her. He stopped his search, his entire body freezing, and every hair on his body stood at attention. She slipped her arms around his waist, and her small hands spanned across his toned stomach as she placed a small kiss between his shoulder blades. She finally withdrew her arms from around his waist, her hands trailing over his sides, and he turned to face her. He looked down at her, smiling slightly as he reached out and clasped one hand behind her neck, pulling her close. His lips crashed down on hers, and she willingly returned his eager kiss as she slipped her arms around his body, running her hands up and down his bare back, gripping his skin.

His hand stayed clasped behind her neck, and the other gripped her hip as he moved them towards his bed. The back of her legs met the edge of his bed, and she pulled away, looking behind her. Removing her arms from around Zac’s body, she sat down on the edge of the bed and pushed herself towards the head of the bed, laying back and resting against his pillows, her hair fanning out around her.

Zac crawled onto his bed and over her flushed body, her chest rising and falling rapidly with each breath, and he placed a knee on her either side of her body, weary to let his body rest against hers. He leaned down, dropping a kiss on her forehead and then on one of her cheeks before kissing her lips. She immediately licked at his bottom lip, persuading him to open his mouth, and when he did, she took full advantage, caressing his tongue with her own. Her hands roamed up and down his smooth back, feeling his muscles move and flex, and soon her hands came to the front, caressing his stomach and hips. The soft touch of her hands was driving him crazy, and Zac groaned, unable to take much more, and finally settled his body on top of hers.

One of his hands traveled to grip her hip, his thumb rubbing over her hip bone, and Jolyn bit down on his bottom lip. Groaning, his hips shifted lightly against hers, and she opened her legs wider, allowing him to settle between her legs. His hand soon slipped from her hip to touch over her stomach underneath her top, and it slowly inched its way towards her chest, daring to cup her left breast. Jolyn moaned into his open mouth, encouraging his actions, and he continued to massage her breast, relishing and delighting in the noises coming from her. He finally tore his lips from hers, kissing down the column of her neck and towards the deep v of her top as he brushed his thumb over her nipple through her bra, and Jolyn bit down on her bottom lip to keep from moaning aloud.

“Zac,” she breathed.

“Hmm,” he moaned against her skin.

“We…we need to stop.”

Breathing heavily, Zac sighed as he dropped his head, resting it against her shoulder. “Yeah,” he nodded slightly. “I...I just need to calm myself,” he mumbled, his cheeks reddening.

She nodded, laughing lightly. “That’s fine,” she whispered, stroking his lower back. “I’m going to go change.”

Zac grunted in response, rolling off of her. Sighing, he pushed his face into the pillow, surprised by how heated things had gotten and how fast, especially after the talk they had just had. He heard Jolyn change out of her clothes into his and sat up once he was sure she was done and he could move without being too embarrassed.

“You don’t mind if I just sleep in my boxers, do you?”

Jolyn shook her head, crawling into his bed underneath the covers. “It’s fine.”

“Are you sure you won’t be able to keep yourself from molesting me in my sleep?” he grinned.

“I’m pretty sure I’ll be able to contain myself,” she answered, rolling her eyes, as Zac slipped off his pants.

Zac tossed his jeans in the direction of his closet, watching as they landed on the floor, and pulled back the covers, climbing in next to Jolyn. She immediately snuggled into his side, placing her head on his chest, and he wrapped his arm around her, pulling her closer.

“Comfortable?”

“Mmm hmm.”

“Good. At least one of us is,” he teased.

“Fine,” she mumbled, beginning to pull away.

He laughed, pulling her back. “I was kidding. You’re more than welcome to snuggle with me.”

“No, I don’t want to anymore.”

“Aw, please,” he pouted, jutting out his bottom lip for added effect.

“Is that how you get what you want? Does that really work?”

“Apparently not with you,” he chuckled.

Jolyn rolled her eyes, snuggling back into Zac’s arms and warmth as she placed a hand on his bare chest. Zac’s free hand came up to grasp her small hand in his bigger one, and his thumb began to move back and forth, caressing the back of her hand. She reflected on the events of the night, pleased with how it had turned out, but her mind couldn’t seem to shake the one thought she wanted desperately to get rid of for the time being. It was part of the reason she had confronted Zac about them sleeping together.

Thinking of her daughter made her think of sex, and she wanted to know where Zac stood on the subject. Did he expect them to sleep together early on in their relationship, or was he a guy that waited until the relationship better established? She was in no way ready to sleep with Zac even though she had thought about it because even though they’d use protection, she’d always fear getting pregnant again. And in no way was she ready to be pregnant again. She thought maybe one day she might be ready to sleep with Zac, but she didn’t see that day being one in the near future. She had told herself she would wait until she was in love with a guy she knew she could trust before sleeping with someone again, but if she never opened herself up and never trusted guys with her heart, she might not ever see that day, even if she was beginning to trust Zac more and more with each passing day and even though he was breaking down her wall piece by piece.

“You asleep?” questioned Zac since she had been quiet for so long, interrupting her thoughts.

“In four days, my daughter would have been two,” she whispered into his chest.

Zac’s body stilled, surprised by her declaration.

“I know you don’t know what to say,” she murmured, reading his mind. “It’s okay, Zac.”

“I wish I did know what to say,” he responded.

“I know, but it’s okay. You don’t have to say anything.”

Zac nodded, squeezing her body to his lightly. “I would like to say though that I do know she would have been a beautiful little girl.”

Jolyn didn’t respond, merely nodding her head the best she could, and it was then that he felt her warm tears drip onto his skin. He intertwined the fingers of their hands that still lay on his chest, and his other hand immediately began to rub soothing circles on her back as he let her cry, her tears creating warm pools on his skin. He felt his own eyes glisten with tears as he listened to her choke back sobs, and he hated the thought that she was in so much pain and that he had no idea how to comfort her. Therefore, he did the only thing he knew; he kept her wrapped his arms, providing as much comfort as he could by rubbing her back, while he let her cry until she exhausted herself, much like she had the night they had first kissed and he had first learned of her heartbreaking past.

------------------------

The next morning Zac awoke to Jolyn still wrapped in his arms, sleeping surprisingly soundly, and he listened to her soft, even breathing and ran his hand along her back, tangling it in her hair so often. He smiled, realizing he could easily get used to falling asleep and waking up with her in his arms.

However, his mind flashed back to the last time he had seen Kate, to the morning after in her hotel room, how he had held her the exact same as he was with Jolyn and how he had done the exact same things, stroking her back and tangling his hands in her hair, thinking the exact same thoughts. His hand stilled in Jolyn’s hair, and his throat tightened just at the thought of Kate and at how similar the two situations were. He hadn’t talked to Kate since they had agreed to see other people, under false pretenses on his part, and that was almost two weeks earlier. He could lie and say it was because he had wanted to give her her space, but in reality, he had been focusing all of his attention on Jolyn and their relationship. He closed his eyes, sighing, disappointed in the way he had been acting and in the person he had become. Neither of the girls deserved someone like him; they deserved better - someone who respected them enough to be completely truthful with them. But it wasn’t a matter of whether he respected them or not because he did. It was a matter of getting over his cowardly ways, and it was a matter of not being so selfish, fearing the outcomes when the truth was revealed.

He thought of all the talks he had with his brothers and, most importantly, Natalie, and of Jolyn crying the night before, so broken and hurt. He knew that if Jolyn ever thought he had cheated on her, it would break her heart, destroying any and all trust she ever had in him, and he imagined he would only add to the pain she already suffered from. He couldn’t bear the thought of causing her that much hurt and making her cry like she had the night before, and he couldn’t imagine ever doing the same thing to Kate. He didn’t want to be that guy. He knew the situation had to be fixed and soon before it got worse than it already was. He had to fight hard against his cowardly ways and be an adult, taking responsibility for his actions and his mistakes.

Jolyn stirring in his arms brought him back to reality, and she moaned when she reached consciousness, trying to stuff her face into Zac’s chest. He chuckled at her antics and pinched her side lightly.

“Hey,” she grumbled, opening her eyes and looking up at him.

“Morning,” he smiled softly.

“Morning,” she yawned.

“How are you feeling?” he questioned.

Jolyn shrugged. “A bit better. I’m sorry for crying like that last night.”

“No, don’t apologize,” he said softly, caressing her cheek. “It’s okay.”

She smiled in response and nodded, closing her eyes again.

“You’re not going back to sleep, are you?”

“No,” she whispered. “What time is it?”

“Just a little after 9:30,” he answered, glancing at the clock on the nightstand to his left. “Do you have class today?”

She nodded. “At noon. I should probably head out soon.”

“Do you want something to eat before you go?”

“Nah, I’ll eat something quick before I go to class, but thank you.,” she smiled, finally pulling herself up into a sitting position.

She ran a hand over her tired face and pulled it through her hair. She glanced to her right to see Zac pulling back the covers and climbing out of bed before heading for his closet. She couldn’t help but bite her lip as she watched the muscles in his back flex as he bent over and grabbed a pair of sweatpants, pulling them on over his boxers.

“What?” he questioned when he turned to find her watching him.

She shook her head. “Nothing,” she grinned, climbing out of his bed and gathering her clothes before slipping off his boxers she was wearing and pulling on her jeans. “Mind if I wear this home?” she questioned, tugging on his shirt she was wearing.

“No, you look sexy in it.”

Jolyn rolled her eyes, heading towards his bedroom door and pulling it open. She heard Zac following behind her as she made her way down the hallway, and on their way to the front door, they passed Taylor in the kitchen, sitting at the counter with his head in his hands. Jolyn stifled a giggle and walked over to him, placing a gentle hand on his back.

“How you feeling?” she questioned quietly.

He merely grunted, shaking his head lightly.

Jolyn looked up to see Isaac watching them with a smirk on his face, and Jolyn returned the smile, laughing lightly. “Do you remember much of last night?”

“I don’t want to think about it,” he grumbled. “I expected more from you, Jol. I thought you would at least stop me from doing stupid stuff unlike my brothers.”

“Aw, Taylor, don’t you know how entertaining you are,” she grinned.

“Gee, I’m glad my embarrassing myself is entertaining to you guys.”

“Don’t take offense,” laughed Isaac. “He’s always cranky the morning after a night of drinking.”

“None taken. I know plenty of people who are the same way. Anyway, I’ll see you guys later. This college student has to go to class and learn something. Bye guys. Happy birthday, Isaac.”

“Have fun,” smiled Isaac as Taylor merely mumbled a goodbye.

Once Jolyn reached the front door, she pulled her jacket off the hook near the door and slipped it on. “So I’ll call you later,” she questioned, turning towards Zac.

He nodded. “Sounds good.”

“Even though it may not seem like it based on how I acted towards the end of last night, I really did have a good time.”

“Don’t worry about it,” he said, shaking his head. “That conversation was bound to happen sooner or later, and like I said before, that other thing…don’t even worry about it, okay?”

“Okay,” she smiled. “I’ll talk to you later.”

“Have fun at class,” he whispered, leaning over and giving her a small kiss before she slipped out the door.

He closed the door behind her and turned to find Natalie standing there, watching him with her arms crossed over her chest and a sour look on her face.

“Nice shirt she was wearing,” scoffed Natalie.

“Don’t even start,” he stated. “I don’t want to hear it.”

“I presume you guys had a good time together last night,” she ventured daringly, knowing all too well that Zac usually waited a good deal of time before he slept with someone.

“I didn’t sleep with her if that’s what you’re implying.”

“That’s not what it looks like to me,” she said, gesturing towards his shirtless torso.

“Just stop, Nat. Nothing happened, and nothing will for quite some time. You know that.”

“And will you still be with Kate then? Or will you be dating a new girl along with Jolyn?”

Zac shook his head, irritated. “I’m not in the mood for a lecture. I thought we’ve been through this.”

“And so that means I’m supposed to just continue to sit back and watch as you cheat on my best friend and hurt her and another girl? I’m sorry, but when I see my best friend’s boyfriend or whatever the hell you are to her, kissing another girl wearing his shirt and him wearing next to nothing himself, it’s a little difficult to control my anger. You’re hurting a girl who doesn’t deserve it whatsoever. She’s so in love with you, and you’re taking advantage of that.”

“You promised to give me time to figure this out.”

“What is there to figure out, Zac?” she urged. “How to juggle them both at once? How to keep them from finding about each other?”

“This situation is not as simple as you think it is,” he argued.

“It is,” she stated forcefully. “It is that simple, Zac. You let one of the girls go, and I’m assuming it’s going to be Kate. All you have to do is tell her that you want to break up and that you’re seeing someone else. Quit giving her false hope. You know what you’re doing is wrong; otherwise, you wouldn’t be hiding any of this from them,” she hissed, pushing past him and joining her husband in the kitchen.

Chapter Twenty-Two continued...